dizzy darling

Last night, I came home and ate a piece of king cake. Then I exercised for about 30 minutes (just light stuff...some jumping jacks, jogging in place, stretches, sit ups, etc.), grabbed my books and went to the library. I don't know if exercising metabolized all that sugar extra fast or what, but when I was driving, I started feeling dizzy. By the time I got to the library, I was shaking from trying so hard to focus. I sat in the car for a bit until my vision stopped swimming, then I got out of the car. As soon as I did, I just kind of slumped against the car. A girl asked me if I was okay. She wanted to walk me in.

I got inside, went to the bathroom and threw up a bit, from the nausea-inducing dizziness. I started doing some reading afterwards and felt okay until suddenly...I remember feeling dizzy and then I remember waking up. I guess I passed out. Luckily I was in the back of the 3rd floor stacks, so no one noticed but it scared me pretty badly. I finished my chapter, drank some water and went home.

I called my mom and told her a little and she pointed out how I've been talking about being exhausted lately, even though I've been getting 7, 8, even 10 hours of sleep some days. School and work simply haven't been busy enough to justify that. I'm seeing the gyno on Friday and I plan on talking to her about the PCOS, as well as seeing if she can order some labwork. But I'm scared to drive. I'm worried that I'll pass out in class and make a spectacle of myself. I'm petrified that things have gotten really out of control somewhere along the line. And I feel bad for worrying my mom, who started saying things like "I don't want you to be on dialysis because you weren't taking your medicine. I'll help you pay for it." I don't want her to have to do that, but the reality is that I'm unsure how I'll pay for it if the costs are still what they used to be ($32/birth control + $45/byetta shot + $15/Metformin + $10/Spironolactone). But I'd rather figure out how to pay on my own then ask her for money.

Today isn't much better. I'm still...fuzzy for lack of a better word. I couldn't eat last night. I had a bit of granola this morning (homemade, so not doused with HFCS) and I'm drinking coffee (not the best idea but I'm so tired and it's better than Coke) and lots of water to try and flush my system. BSS is tonight and I'm excited to see them but that excitment is held in check by the thought that I might need to leave early or something will happen.

So basically, no more king cake for now.