Saturday, August 14, 2010

an accounting

Mandi: I got really depressed yesterday and called christie and asked if I could come in
I just feel really fucking out of place
and alone
I don't know.
I'm not doing very well
Ravi: i'm sorry. i know it's rough
is there anything i can do?
Mandi: no 
I mean, I know its something I just have to get through
because even being around people is depressing me
everything is fucking depressing me
the idea of getting dressed and going outside is depressing
because I just feel like "what am I accomplishing?"
I keep trying to do things, for the sole purpose of feeling like I'm doing something. and then I start thinking. "I am only doing this so I am not lonely." and it feels lonelier

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